This well known formula might help you remember the essential elements of active listening (apologies to Albert Einstein)...

E=MC²
E = Empathise

• Validate how the other person is feeling
• Acknowledge their situation and priorities
• Listen and show understanding
• Use reflective body language
  

M = Motivate

• Be attentive and interested
• Ask open questions to get their story
• Prompt and encourage, verbally and non-verbally
• Emphasise common ground and shared interests
  

C² = Clarify and Confirm

• Restate what the person says using paraphrasing
• Use closed questions to check understanding
• Summarise the situation, and any agreed actions, in your own words
• Invite the other person to correct any misunderstandings
  

Unlike the original version of this formula, the active listening version is safe to experiment with at home and in the workplace.

© Will Moore 2011

Tags: empathy, listening